Lately, my body hates me. I won’t get into my medical history, but my body aches, cramps and tenses periodically throughout the day and it isn’t a whole lot of fun. One of the greatest ways to get the aches to dissipate is to run a nice hot bath. Sunday afternoon hit and I could barely function. So, I informed my husband of my plans, made my way upstairs, and ran a bath in the hopes of re-emerging feeling more like me. I will be honest, I did come out of the bath feeling much better than before. So, I thought I would share how you too can enjoy a nice relaxing bath at home when the kids are still awake. It only requires about 22 steps to accomplish the same experience I had.
How to Enjoy a Relaxing Bath when the Kids are Awake in 22 Easy Steps
- Inform your husband of your plans. Getting him on the same page will surely result in as smooth of an experience as possible.
- Head upstairs. Be sure to grab a good read before heading into the bathroom.
- Remove the copious amounts of bath toys from the bath. Of course, these should have been cleaned up after the kids’ last bath time but obviously weren’t.
- Remove mystery sludge from the bath. Resolve never to try and identify mystery substances by smelling them again.
- Run a nice hot bath using Epsom salts, essential oils, and/ every other fixing to make this experience especially lavish.
- Disrobe, slip into the bath, and start reading. This really is nice, isn’t it?
- Feeling your aches and pains start to ease as you slowly acquire a pint-sized audience.
- Pretend not to notice said audience. Move your shampoo and conditioner away from their reach.
- Realize that ignoring said audience is futile as they attempt to missile launch the previously removed bath toys into your bath water.
- Drop your book to your side and do your best to remove each toy as it is fired.
- Have your attempts at a toy-free bath shut down as the entire container of bath toys dumped upon you.
- Realize the toys may have been a planned decoy to soap your hair. Your non-toy wielding toddler found the one bottle you forgot to move to the other side of the bath and used it on your hair.
- Rince your hair with a vengeance hoping a good shampoo will be enough to get the healthy amount of soap out of your hair.
- Decide that ignoring the bath toys, your audience, and their two-front attack is the best way to salvage this bath.
- Have your preschooler use the toilet and request you wipe her bum.
- Attend to your child only to realize that in the process your toddler son has disrobed and climbed into your bath.
- Realize it is now unfair to exclude your preschooler and acquiesce to her pleads to join the bath too.
- Undress your second child.
- As you make way for her to join in the “fun,” feel a cold stream of liquid hit your body.
- Turn towards the stream confirming that you are, in fact, being peed on by your toddler.
- Erupt in laughter as only you can in such a situation.
- Emerge from the bath wondering why on earth anyone would pay for a spa when relaxing at home is so darn tangible?
[bctt tweet=”Vow never to try to ID mystery sludge by smelling it & 21 tips for a relaxing bath. #parenting” username=”parentfromheart”]