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You are here: Home / Your Child's Education / After-School Meltdowns: Practical Strategies to Get Ahead of Crying and Whining

August 22, 2017 By Alana Pace 1 Comment

After-School Meltdowns: Practical Strategies to Get Ahead of Crying and Whining

If you have faced regular after-school meltdowns, don’t worry. Here are powerful, practical tips for kids to get ahead of crying and whining.


 

We had just arrived home after a challenging road trip home. My oldest son was sick and upset the whole way home. The baby wanted to nurse endlessly. On top of it, we had driven home in terrible traffic.

 

My happiness reserves depleted around the 200km mark into our 450km trip. I was in survival mode from then on. When pulled up to our driveway, I basically fell out the car door.

 

My daughter, on the other hand, bounded from her booster seat. She was spritely. Her eyes sparkled. As my husband and I unpacked the car, she raced to the mailbox and looked up at our box with elation.

 

She was antsy with anticipation because the mail contained a letter that told us whose class she would be in next year.  As my husband ripped open the envelope, she shook with anticipation. She squealed as she found out who her teacher was. Honestly, I doubt there’s an answer she wouldn’t have been happy with. Now, she has a countdown of how many more sleeps until she’s back to school.

 

While her excitement about school has absolutely captured my heart, I’m bracing myself a bit too. You see, school has been both the best and worst of times for my precocious child. My daughter gives school her all. As such, she comes home fried. 

 

I remember the first time I picked her up from preschool. I had been counting down the minutes until I could go get her. While I was thrilled to be reunited with her and hear all about her day, she was irritable and despondent. As preschool carried on, I began to brace myself for anger, tears, and difficult behaviour.

 

Three years into this kids-in-school endeavour, I have become much more proficient at getting ahead of after-school meltdowns. Below you’ll find the practical strategies I use to get ahead of after-school meltdowns. They’re practical, easy, and powerful too.

 

If you have faced regular after-school meltdowns, don't worry. Here are powerful, practical tips for kids to get ahead of crying and whining. Positive Parenting strategies. Parenting from the Heart

 

After School Meltdowns: How to get ahead of crying and whining

Get their blood sugar up fast.

Click here to continue reading.

 

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Filed Under: Positive Parenting Strategies, Posts, Readers' Favourites, Your Child's Education Tagged With: after school advice, back to school, education, Parenting, parenting from the heart, positive parenting strategies

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Hi! I'm Alana. When I'm not nursing cold, stale coffee, I usually can be found with the baby on my hip, barefoot, and racing after my two older kids. Thanks to a degree in psychology and a free-range childhood backing onto an expansive evergreen forest, positive parenting and play-based learning are my passions. Read more here.

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Me to my 5yo: stay still I want to take your pictu Me to my 5yo: stay still I want to take your picture.
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A beautiful reminder to find little ways to connec A beautiful reminder to find little ways to connect with our children ❤️❤️❤️
Often people fear responsive parenting will create Often people fear responsive parenting will create needy kids. 

Developmental research suggests otherwise. 

The more reliably and compassionately that we respond to our children’s needs, the more secure and assured they feel to venture out into the world.

Attachment & independence aren’t two opposite sides of a spectrum but two sides of the same coin.
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Via Matt Beaudreau
I remember in my earlier days of parenting when I I remember in my earlier days of parenting when I had two under two so much of my life was spent thinking I’ll be happy when…

I’ll be happy when they sleep through the night.

I’ll be happy when my husband doesn’t have to work such late hours.

I’ll be happy when I look and feel like myself again and not a feeding troth 😬😬😬

As it turns out this struggle with finding happiness isn’t unique to me or parenting. 

Collectively our mental health is suffering, but there are many research backed ways to improve happiness. (Link in bio to read more).
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Though there are countless people who understand t Though there are countless people who understand the importance of positive, responsive parenting, the idea that young children should self-soothe remains a prevalent belief.

Though this ideology is well-intentioned, it actually goes against what we know about human development.

Babies come into the world highly dependent on responsive caregiving not only for nurturance and protection but also to foster social and emotional development.

While it may seem that leaving a child to cry will help her learn to cope, it actually floods her brain with cortisol. She doesn’t learn to self-soothe but instead to shut down.

Though it may seem counterintuitive to some, independence is fostered through responsive care. The less stressed a child feels, the safer he feels to explore his world. The less stressed he feels, the more appropriate his emotional responses become.

This is first seen in late infancy but pervades through childhood and adulthood.

Have any questions about these findings? Feel free to comment below or send me a message!
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So often independence and attachment are thought t So often independence and attachment are thought to be mutually exclusive.
However, research shows that in order for children (and adults) to be independent, they need to feel safe and secure within their closest relationships. In childhood, this means having caregivers who respond to distress and both emotional and physical needs.
In adulthood, people who have responsive and caring partners feel more stable and comfortable being independent.
So hold and comfort those babies.
Hug and respond to your kids.
Love and hold space for the adults you are closest to.
Attachment fosters independence.
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